Taking out a twelve inch knife from the drawer, I sliced off a piece of Armstrong cheddar cheese and devoured it. I smelled that dog fart for the rest of the day and into the evening. Needing to find comfort, I played with the pliable wax ringing the lit three pillar candle as if I were able to manipulate the world.
It wasn’t until I accepted the street dog in myself and identified with the living loving entity I am that I relaxed enough to go to bed. I couldn’t remember my dreams but I know I woke with joy in the morning. Joy and a peace in my soul that I am lovable and with a realization that I can love myself.
Following that personal insight, I was flooded with some people’s good intentions. A good friend shared her mentor with me and showed me the value of having one. Then my mentor revealed herself to me. I am grateful.
The situation reminds me of the parable of the little tailor Seven At One Blow – Brothers Grimm Tales | Bedtime Stories (storyberries.com) . Once I stopped trying to manipulate things, my peace and wonder and contentment grew.